I'm weirdly inclined to try out (or think about trying out) a bunch of creative persuits only to stop before I even get to the first hurdle or fall flat on my face trying to jump over it. I think drawing has been one of the few creative endeavours that I've stuck with for long enough to become somewhat competent at.
All this to say, deciding to create a website was spur of the moment and I had this feeling in the back of my skull that I'd probably drop it after a couple days or weeks and never look at it again.
I hate to say it but I can be disgustingly self-aware when I want to be.
So I did just that. I slapped text onto a plain background, centred it and called it day. It was so bland that I took 2 months off of working on the thing.
You know how artists get this fear of a blank canvas? That was basically me with this site. I ended up using Sadgrl's template, but then that became stagnant and bleh.
Ever since I decided to employ the use of tables and divs to create my layout, this has been one of the most engaging hobbies I've ever had. HTML coding at a fundamental level is really easy to get a hold of. I had documents filled with notes and the like, and it actually made the process more confusing when I was starting out. Sometimes you just have to dive in headfirst and trust Google's ability to interpret what snippets of code you're looking for.
Now that I have this grasp on the fundamentals, I just spend my days tinkering about with the site. It's generally basic things like adding/changing images, updating the fim log or messing about with the layouts of my shrine pages.
I'm at a point in my life where I have incredibly little to fill my time; I don't even have a job. I'm forever bored or restless and undestimulated, yet somehow I never find myself tiring of this damn site. I've told one of my friends that this thing is basically my baby because it is. I care deeply about maintaining it, even if that means adding slightly aimless witterings to keep up a semi-consistent flow of written content.
While the rest of my peers have scurried off to their first year university, I have found myself become pensive about my own life and future. This site helps me feel like I'm not wasting away my life, even if to many it's not that big a deal.